After looking at the title of this post, is the iconic Beastie Boys song blaring in your ears? I have a feeling you’re not alone. Or, perhaps, you can still remember football player Travis Kelce screaming this rant after his team’s recent Superbowl win?
Yeah, it was a bit much.
For over 30 years (I still can’t believe it was that long ago) this has been a rallying cry for those who insist they must do whatever necessary to defend their “rights.” But what if such passionate determination referred to another matter that has nothing to do with a raucous party? What if “You Gotta fight! For Your Right!”
Refers to Marriage.
Wasn’t expecting that, huh? Neither was I as Bill and I sat in church last Sunday. Our pastor is encouraging Christian couples to really think about what a Christian marriage should look like. What a blessing to have this wonderful pastor. He reminds all couples that we should operate as one unit, one that makes decisions together, one of total trust, one that puts Christ at its center.
ONE.
I don’t think any couple can be reminded of this enough. For those of you that read my blog or follow me on social media, you may be asking yourself, “Wait, didn’t Angie go through a divorce years ago?” You are correct. It was brutal and heart-breaking. I felt gutted and shamed that a Christian women had to endure this nightmare. Perhaps you’ve been in my shoes.
I also vowed that if I survived, I’d commit myself to talking with pastors, therapists, and other hurting people, to glean any bit of wisdom I could share with others. If I can help one woman from enduring this pain, it’s worth throwing myself under the bus. Shouldn’t we use our test as our testimony?
It’s why recovered drug addicts are so good at helping others who are struggling. They’ve been there. They know the excuses, the pain and the desperation.
I’ll never be one that says I know all the answers about love and marriage. But I have learned some valuable pearls, to say the least. As I sat in church and took notes last week, I wrote one word down repeatedly. ONENESS. I shook my head, knowing that had been greatly lacking in my past. I didn’t grow up seeing it much and I didn’t practice it in my former marriage either. A husband and wife must act as a team of one. As the old saying goes, “there is no I in T-E-A-M.”
Decisions on finances? Team decision. Career choices to make? Team decision. Parenting kids? Team decision. When both husband and wife don’t hold on to the steering wheel equally, it’s only a matter of time until they veer off into the weeds or straight over a cliff.
You must stand together as a force that no one can manipulate and steer off course. Yes, it’s hard, especially if those that threaten it are family, friends, or co-workers.
It doesn’t matter. You are ONE.
Our pastor put it this way: Look at the word UNITED. If that “i” gets put in the wrong place, the word becomes “UNTIED.” Think about it. And friend, know the Enemy will use everything and everyone in his arsenal to “untie” what God has brought together. Double knot your marriage so tightly that no one would dare try and pull the first string. Most importantly, pray to your “team captain,” your Heavenly Father. Allow Him to call the plays. His word is very clear, “you and your husband are ONE.” I know a couple in their 50’s that hangs on to that with four hands.
Remember to fight for your right…. to protect your marriage. Now THAT is worthy of one wild and crazy party.
Always,
Angie (find my other blog posts at https://www.angiespady.com/blogs/news
